Don’t be held back by limiting beliefs
Carlotta Daniels-Randolph | 7/2/2017, 8:32 a.m.
What’s holding you back from reaching your goals? Chances are you may believe it is money, education, experience or good fortune and luck. First “luck” has nothing to do with it, but yes, education and experience are essential tools to help us accomplish a great deal and these things are often cited as the reasons for lack of achievement. However, before we can effectively use these tools we need to have the right mindset and attitude that will drive us to success. Some evidence of this is that there has been grants and scholarships available for education and training for decades, but not all people who could benefit from them are utilizing these resources. What is keeping so many people from accessing or effectively using these valuable assets?
Having dreams and plans to achieve our heart’s desire is our yearning to do, be and have more in this life. However, unless we understand, feel and believe at the core of our being that we deserve and are worthy, and capable of success, we will have difficulty and challenges reaching our goals. We often dare to dream, but fail to achieve because fear and doubt stops us in our tracks. Why? Because what we think, feel and believe at our core typically shows up in our experience.
It is true that sometimes we are not consciously aware of the sense of unworthiness that may be buried in our subconscious mind. There are both direct and subtle messages that feed this negative sense of self that often begins in our childhood and can be reinforced as we grow older. Unfortunately, too many people internalize limiting messages about race, gender and social –economic class that prevent them from realizing the fruits of their gifts, talents and hard work
Also, there is a very unfortunate tendency among many people globally to believe that one’s ethnic, or racial group’s historical story dictates one’s life now, and that you deserve to succeed or fail because of that generalized story. Think of all the individuals who have achieved greatness who refused to be held hostage by a history of oppression. Consider the individuals who expect success based on a generalized story, but have deep seated doubt about their own ability. This often leads to unhappiness and sometimes resentment of others.
Success rests on the shoulders of the individual. Each person, no matter who they are or the historic past of the group they identify with, is responsible for his or her own success. It is not given, it is earned and you deserve it if you believe that you do and are willing to do the work it takes to accomplish your goals.
Where to begin to change your thoughts to position yourself for success? First, stop listening to the naysayers-- including yourself. Read books and articles about positive psychology. Many psychologists, spiritual leaders and teachers, life coaches and others have written about how to change your thoughts to mirror what you want to see in your experience of life. There are children’s tales and fables that encouraged us to believe in ourselves. Remember the story “The Little Engine That Could”?
Start a daily meditation that includes positive statements about yourself and your ability and add a list of things that you are grateful for. It may sound like a lot of woo woo, but it is an essential truth. You can overcome steep challenges if you truly believe that you can.
Carlotta Daniels-Randolph, M.Ed. is a workforce development professional with 20 years’ experience in the public and private sector and an administrator and adjunct instructor at Delaware County Community College.